The Half-Truths of Self-Help

Hello,

I hope everyone had a pleasant weekend. We spent some lovely time, first in the church (yes, all of us!) , then at the beach. But more of that (with pictures) later today (I hope!)

What I want to write about right now is the Self-Help trap. I have read tens of self-help books in the last decade, and I have taken part in as much courses and seminars. If you have friends or kids who are tempted, stop them on their tracks.

There are plenty of reasons why. There is this interesting article to read and discuss from TCW, but I want to add my own experience. Ask me as many questions, I'll answer them, because I've been through it, thank God, and with God's grace, I am not looking back.

I can assure you that the self-help movement like the religious syncretism is yet another plot of the evil one to draw us far from God. Self-help is such a selfish concept, such a false concept! It is evil from its conception. It is flattering: YOU are the master of your life, YOU are the perfect one, YOU can fix everything that bothers you. It leads you in denying God's power, God's hand in your life. It makes you believe that you and only you are responsible for your happiness, thus letting you plunge into unhappiness and despair every time something goes miserably wrong.

Self-help leads to endless blame. If I am the one who can fix it, how come I can't, you wonder, and head for the next miracle weekend/book/set of tapes/the works! But you know what? Well, I do now, and I hope I shall never fall into that trap again.

What those new age prophets advocate is not entirely wrong. In fact many exercises are quite helpful. They are what the title of that article and my post says: half-truths. They are not entirely wrong, otherwise our warning signals would keep us away. They don't tell you not to trust in Jesus Christ, but they use jargon that leads you away from Him: They call God Spirit, The One, All That Is. Everything is good. This is what the evil one wants us to believe. That he does not exist. By accepting as our own saviors we negate Christ the Savior. We're hiding our heads in the sand, persuading ourselves that with the right tools that those generous writers with the happy smiles and unpronounceable names provide us we'll sort everything out. Slip once and you are into the pit.

Combine this with the westerners' curiosity. Our indulgent lives. The certainties of our established economic and cultural supremacy. Self help and syncretism are so tempting.

So, whatever you do, not even start reading self-help. I have just began reading some verses of the New Testament every night, before I go to bed. Sometimes after I've prayed. Sometimes I just slip a few words in my mind. This is all I need. Trust in God Jesus Christ and yourselves as His children. This is all I need to know.

"I Am the Way, the Truth, and the Life"

A More Mindful Year

I believe that every busy woman, and that definitively includes mothers, should read certain books. Not quick fix ones, but books that help US find our way to the lives we really love living.
The Life Organizer: A Woman's Guide to a Mindful Year that personal coach and best-selling author Jennifer Louden has just published, is one of them. It offers life insights, based on self-kindness, and supports true (as opposed to shadow) comforts that we pick because they are truly good for us and our dreams. It is a wonderful tool to help us approach our dreams one step at a time.

Please have a look at the entry in my self-help blog, Talisman, that I've just began. I hope to keep it updated with useful women wisdom!
Please check The Life Organizer and have a look at my detailed entry about Jennifer and the book. Then set sail to a more conscious and fulfilling life!

Anger is good for you!

I have long tried to control my feelings. It took me years of guided meditation, breathing techniques and yoga. Not bad.
However, I have come to believe that not all feelings should be controlled as in pacified. I think that one particular feeling, anger for a number of reasons from injustice in the world to specific behaviors is not as bad as we might think. The obvious reaction is to either beat yourself up for being nasty or go ahead and forgive and forget to save you some peace of mind.
What I now think though, is that we shoud instead stay with the feeling, live with it, taste it, and then chanel it in a creative way. That could take various forms, depending on the issue.
If you are angry about what happens to the environment then you should join an organisation combating senseless and selfish decisions by governments and industrialists.
If someone hurts your feelings about your self value, then you should use this as a boost to expand your value and ability.
No evil is free from good, as the Greeks used to say...